So much on my mind. So many questions. So little confidence in what I think and believe. That is why I wanted to start this particular blog. A place to muse through some of the things that have me wondering.
Maybe y'all don't wonder about these things. Perhaps you have your set of beliefs and are very comfortable with them. That is amazing to me. With so much information on so many different topics and so many differing opinions from godly men and women who really want to know the truth about God, about salvation, about sin, about the world, about Christ Jesus, about Holy Spirit, about the gifts of the Spirit, etc., etc., I don't know how anyone could be comfortable with their understanding of truth. UGH!!!
OK, OK, before we go any further, a little disclaimer. This is NOT a professional blog, I am NOT a professional writer, and right now I really don't care about how well this is written. I KNOW I use way too many exclamation marks. My caps lock is NOT randomly clicking on and off, that's just how I choose to emphasize my words. But for too long, I have let my concerns about how well I write keep me from actually writing. So, I choose to focus on expressing what's in my heart, and leave the grammar check go.
Back to the topic: This all started because of the current chaos regarding the rather recent legalization of homosexual marriages and the response by the 'church' to the issue. I have been thinking about the issue and trying to understand what a Godly response should be, and I my mind keeps going back and forth, round and round on the issue. So, I thought that writing would help me to better focus and organize my thoughts, helping me to find my way through all the noise and emotion and theological wrestling that is going on.
But it isn't just this one issue. Today, another one of those difficult issues came up for me, the issue of salvation. Is it 'once saved, always saved'? Can we lose our salvation? Do I need to be sure that I am keeping short accounts with God, confessing each and EVERY sin so that I don't die in my sin and go to hell? I have always leaned to the eternal salvation side of things, believing that once we have made that stand, that confession of our faith, our choice to believe and follow God, that Holy Spirit would then help to keep us from 'slipping' out of God's grip. And I have experienced this in my life. But yet, is that an 'easy' belief that I hold onto so I don't have to be more conscientious in my walk? Hmmm?
So, I begin this with the purpose of thinking through some of these things. I am starting without any organization or outline, so you may find this to be too random and wandering for your taste. I also begin by saying that I am NOT a theologian nor a cleric of any kind. I am not asking you to follow me down this path as I lay out truth for you. This is simply my walk of seeking and wondering and questioning. This is my way of calling out to God and ACTIVELY seeking His leading and His answers for my own heart.
One more point (which is probably the most important of all), truth I can STAND ON will ultimately ONLY be found in God's Word as inspired and translated by Holy Spirit. So, I remind myself that it must be the Word of God with the leading and translation of Holy Spirit, which comes by much prayer. I hope and pray that I will stick to that.
You are welcome to walk with me, just don't expect perfection.
Ev
